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Buddy Rich
Neil Peart
John Bonham
Steve Gadd
Ringo Starr
Keith Moon
Carl Palmer
Gene Krupa
Max Roach
Elvin Jones
Ginger Baker
Billy Cobham
Stewart Copeland
Dennis Chambers
Jaki Leibezeit
Terry Bozzio
Bill Bruford
Hal Blaine
Mike Portnoy

Drummer Jokes


Yes, I know. Drum jokes can get pretty anoying if you're a drummer. But, some of them are quite funny. Lets be honest, there are a lot of drummers out there who are so bad that they deserve some of these.

We've got one liner's, funny pictures, and some hilarious videos for you here. Anyway, If you can't beat 'em...join 'em (man, that was terrible).


A guy walks into a shop and says "Hey, I'm looking for one of those sunburst Fender Stratocaster guitars, you got one?" The shop assistant says "You're a drummer, aren't you?" The guy says "Yeah, how did 'ya know?" The assistant says "This is a book shop."

A drummer is playing a live gig, but keeps speeding up and slowing down. The singer is so fed up that he stops halfway through a song and shouts at the drummer "Do you know what TIME is?!" The drummer says "Sure. It's my favourite magazine."

At a live gig, the bass player leans over to the drummer and says "Can't you play a little more dynamic?". The drummer says "I'm already playing as loud as I can!"

A drummer wanted to study music at music school. During his entrance exam the examiner played him the notes C and E, and then asked him to identify what he'd just heard. His confused expression showed that he had no idea what the interval was. He asked "Could I hear it again?...I'm not quite sure yet." The examiner played the notes again. "Hmmm I'm still not more time please." The examiner played the notes once more. The drummer's face lit up "I've got it!...It's a piano isn't it?!"

Want more jokes? Check out these one liners...

One Liners

How do you get a drummer off your porch?
Pay him $10 for the pizza.

What do you call a drummer that breaks up with his girlfriend?

How do you know if a drummer is walking right behind you?
You can hear his knuckles dragging on the ground.

I asked my drummer to spell "Mississippi"
...He said "the river or the state?"

What's the difference between a drum machine and a drummer?
You only have to punch the information into the drum machine once!

How does a drummer know when it's the end of the song?
The rest of the band are stood still just glaring at him.

What do drummers usually eat at lunch?
Tomato soup and a drum roll.

What do you call a drummer in a three-piece suit?
The defendant.

What do you call the part of a gig when everyone goes to the bar?
The drum solo.


Old drummer uses the force!

Old drummer uses the force

The military reveals new drummer boy rocket launcher squad...

Rocket Drummer

Hate lugging your drums to gigs? Problem solved...


Tony had been told so many times that his playing was crap, it had started to take it's toll on him...


The Who's new stand-in drummer was given a standing ovation by fans...


Terry Bozzios' new drum rack was just a tiny bit to heavy...

Just too heavy!

Ok, more crackers coming up. Check out the videos...


A drummer gets his friends to help him pack away at the end of a gig...

Where did I leave my drum set?...

Keith Moon is informed how much his tax bill is for the year...

Fat drummer drinks to much coffee...

A one man band...

The End...

Well, that's the end of our drummer jokes page. Thank goodness for that.

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